As if I was surrounded my mirrors
All I could see was my own tears
My soul finally shattered my prison
So I could see the world when it cries
It's to much for one person to handle
Life, so easy to break and mishandle
When I think I can see myself clearly
As I awake I can choose who I am
So everyone knows I'm inside out
Like the shirt I wear, I'm different
But not one of you can say
You haven't had one day
Where you wear your shirt inside out
Never knowing what they laugh about
From the inside looking out
My life, is so inside out...You Can't Control Your Dreams Only Direct Them in the Right Direction... (Thoughts)?
You might not write for grammar, but grammar good or bad will affect what we hear...and ';see';. As such, be careful of typos...';by mirrors';, ';too much';, etc. Your spelling was otherwise very good. Your rhymed couplets were also very good...very natural, almost sounding accidental, which is exactly the way they should sound. One of the two pairs that were not rhymed was at least slant rhyme, the other one stood out because it didn't...and that pair itself was awkward...';When I think....who I am';...because of the way the second line began. It's the only ';odd'; line in the poem, which is otherwise very well done.
....keep writingYou Can't Control Your Dreams Only Direct Them in the Right Direction... (Thoughts)?
Voice confusion. The majority of this is 1st person singular. If you are ';i';, then you can't change to ';It's to much for one person to handle'; for that changes the voice of who is speaking.
If your metaphor is inside out then your beginning rambles and your ending becomes redundant. Either you are talking about what you feels like to be inside out or you are talking about how others feel being inside out. Decide and write again
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